


The Sharp Knife of a Short Life

by Bluiiieee



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Character Death, Comfort, Crying Alec Lightwood, M/M, Magnus is a good boyfriend, Malec, Sad, Spoiler for COG, kinda OOC for alec but sh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-03
Updated: 2017-05-03
Packaged: 2018-10-27 06:34:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10803747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bluiiieee/pseuds/Bluiiieee
Summary: A year after Max's death it hit Alec hard, Magnus helps him through it.(I'm sorry I suck at summaries. The stories better I swear)





	The Sharp Knife of a Short Life

**Author's Note:**

> Title from 'If I Die Young' by The Band Perry

Alec woke up with the sun, as he had been trained to do since he was young. He already dreaded the day and wished his body would allow him to sleep it away at least a few hours longer. Magnus, who probably wouldn’t wake up for at least another couple of hours laid against him, his long arm splayed across Alec’s chest. Alec sadly hummed to himself before reaching his hand up to lace his own fingers with Magnus’. Magnus shifted slightly but did not wake up.

Beside him, his phone chimed and buzzed on the bedside table where he had left it the night before. He slowly reached to get it, careful not to move too much and risk waking his sleeping boyfriend. Unsurprisingly the message had been from his sister, Isabelle, she had the same sleeping habits as himself, so he assumed she had just woken up as well. The text read:  
“I love you, Big brother. ♥”A small smile pulled at his lips. He knew Isabelle would be upset today, possibly worse than any of the others. He knew she still blamed herself for what had happened even though she had said she didn’t. He texted back a quick ‘I love you too, Iz.’ before rolling on his side, his face resting against Magnus’ chest.  
He laid like that for a long while, his mind racing and recounting memories that felt ages old now. He snapped out of his thoughts when he felt a sudden wetness on his cheek. _When had he started crying?_ He wiped his cheek with the back of his hand before shifting away from Magnus to swing his legs over the end of the bed, his feet hitting the cold wood floor sending a small jolt through him. He felt like he was going to break and he didn’t want to wake Magnus if he does.  
He drowsily strode to the bathroom down the hall, closing the door quietly behind him. In the mirror he saw purple under his eyes, sleep-mussed hair and pale, even paler than usual, skin. He looked completely exhausted, he felt it too. He swiftly brushed his teeth and continued staring at his reflection in the mirror, searching for similarities in his face to Max’s, He wished there were more distinct similarities but Max hadn’t looked much like him or his sister.  
He felt another tear fall from his eye onto his cheek, this time he didn’t stop the tears from falling, better now than when Isabelle and Jace needed him, he thought. More tears fell quickly and didn’t slow. He had hardly cried at all for his brother’s death, he had forced himself to stay strong for his mother and siblings. An ugly sob escaped his mouth causing a surge of panic to rush through him as he quickly clamped his hand over his mouth to quiet himself.  
  
  
Magnus’ eyes fluttered open as the sun rudely shone directly in them. He rolled over on his side with the intention to hide his face in his boyfriend's chest or arm but frowned when he turned to nothing. He had become very accustomed to waking up to Alec, whether it be him stroking his hair or placing a small kiss on his forehead.   
He wondered anxiously where he had gone, any other time Alec got called to the Institute or had to leave early he would briefly wake him to let him know before leaving. He shuffled out of under his expensive duvet and slipped on his fuzzy red slippers before slipping out of his room. As he walked down the hall he noticed the bathroom door was closed. _So he didn’t leave_ Magnus thought before softly knocking on the door “Sweet-pea?” He heard indistinct mumbles from the other side of the door. “Are you alright?”

Alec responded quickly and muffled by the door “Huh? Oh, um _yeah_ , I’m... I’m okay” He stuttered out with a crack in his voice, Magnus hadn’t even needed to see the boy to know he was far from alright. “You don’t sound it. Let me in.” He said, his hand gripping the doorknob, hr figured that it would be locked but tried to twist it anyway.   
“No, Magnus, I’m fine.” Alec insisted. _Typical Lightwood stubbornness._ Magnus thought to himself. He knew he could easily let himself in with the snap of his fingers, literally, but wanted Alec to trust him enough to let him in. “Alexander, please?” Magnus said, a bit of desperation in his voice. “Let me help you.” He added.   
He felt relief spread through him when he heard the click of the lock but the relief was short-lived. Alec opened the door and Magnus’ heart felt like it had dropped a hundred floors when he saw the puffy-eyed figure before him. Alec had his arms wrapped around himself, bringing his shoulders in and hunching his back, making him look much smaller and weaker than he really was. His dark black hair was in a disarray from his hands carding through it roughly in his distress, his normally incredible blue eyes, now puffy and held the color of the sky just before a storm. (Magnus had noticed some time ago that his eyes tended to change color with his emotions), along with red coming from the corners caused by tears and rubbing at them, his tear stained cheeks were a light pink that Magnus would have, in other circumstances, considered cute. Even his usually pale skin seemed paler than usual.   
“Oh, Alec,” Magnus said as he moved to wrap his arms tightly around the boy. Alec returned the hug, gripping at Magnus’ shirt tightly and burying his head into his shoulder. “Max--” He started before cutting himself off with a sharp intake of breath. “Shh, shh, I know.” Magnus cooed as he rubbed Alec’s back.  
“D-did I wake you up? I’m s-sorry. I’m a mess.” Alec rambled on, his voice muffled by Magnus’ shoulder. “It’s okay, Alexander. We all need to break down sometimes.” Magnus said, rocking their bodies side to side. “I-I miss him so much, Mags,” Alec said quietly. Magnus had been surprised that he hadn’t cried much when it happened, but now that Magnus had really gotten to know him he knew he had felt the need to stay strong for his family.   
“I know. It will get easier with time, sweet-pea, never easy, but easier.”  He pressed a small kiss to the top of Alec’s head. “How do you know?” Alec asked in a small, quiet voice. “I’ve been through it myself.” He answered, “Come on, let’s go back to bed for a little while, yeah?” Magnus suggested. “Yeah” Alec replied, almost inaudibly. He removed his face from the other man’s shoulder but grabbed his hand in his own to walk to the bedroom. Magnus now had a wet mark on his night shirt but he didn’t care. 

Magnus and Alec climbed back under the warm covers. Magnus opened his arms inviting Alec to climb into them, which he complied, putting his head on his chest. Magnus placed another small kiss on the top of the boy’s head and softly said: “I love you, Alexander.” Alec sighed and shifted around to kiss Magnus back and say “I love you, too.” Before laying his head back on his chest.

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments are very appreciated <33


End file.
